During my time teaching high school, I grew significantly as a teacher in numerous ways. I had, for the first time, the full run of the classroom without interference or help from my cooperating teacher. Questions, comments, and concerns were all addressed to me as the classroom authority, and I rose to the challenge required by that position. I came to see myself as more of an expert in the field than I had previously believed myself to be. I also found my passion for politics was communicable. The back-drop of the primary elections and caucuses spurred daily debate and interest in my room in a way that I found reassuring. I really believed that I had a purpose in teaching these young adults about their government, as they would soon be leaving the school environment and finding their places in the larger world. This unit helped me connect my personal mission with my profession in a lot of ways that were meaningful to me.
That said, I struggled a lot with the student population that I encountered in this high school setting. These students challenged me, not so much in classroom management, but in their perpetually disaffected attitudes which made me question the relevance of the entire discipline. I responded by challenging myself to find new ways to relate the material to these students’ lives. I fastidiously organized and prepared for my lessons, anticipating their questions and confusion on the subjects. What I could not anticipate was the lack of preparation and organization on the part of students, and that was a daily disappointment to deal with. My lurking fear and doubt was that students truly did not care about their country or government, or even their own education, enough to show up regularly with a pencil and paper. Most students disproved my misgivings, but several reaffirmed them and ended up dropping the class, a requirement for their graduation only one term away. I could not help but feel that my students’ failure reflected some of my own, but I had to take a step back and instead focus on helping the students who showed some amount of effort in my class. I really believe that I did all I could do at this point in my profession, giving infinite chances to make up work, but I still cannot help but feel disappointed in my inability to change the minds of those who dropped out.
In this class I learned that I am a tenacious person who is also sensitive and flexible. I learned that no amount of planning can prepare you for the very real circumstances that students bring to class with them. I learned that I really love teaching, and I love the spark of inspiration reflected back to me in the faces of my students. Politics is everything – its any issue, problem, or concern that people care about and thus it should include the interests of everyone. If only I could communicate that to every student I get the privilege of coming in contact with.
